How I Found My Purpose

When I was younger, I didn’t even realise I was looking for a purpose. Like most young people, I was navigating the challenges of growing up, caught up in the experiences and changes that come with life. I was never sporty, a bit quirky, and while I had friends, I often felt like an outsider. Animals were my solace. I had such a strong connection with them that I remember feeling genuinely shocked when I learned people ate meat. I didn’t like it, and on my 14th birthday, I became a vegetarian.

In my early twenties, I discovered ashtanga yoga, and it was my first taste of discipline and connection—to my body, my breath, and something deeper. Although I loved the practice, I lacked the commitment I admired in others. I’d practise religiously for two weeks and then let life get in the way. This stop-and-start pattern lasted for nearly two decades. But no matter what, yoga stayed with me like an old friend. During tough times, I’d return to my mat, knowing that even if everything felt overwhelming, I’d feel better after a practice.

At 27, I attended my first Vipassana meditation retreat—a gruelling 10 days of silent meditation, sitting with myself for hours. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but the rewards were profound. That practice became another tool in my wellbeing toolkit, a way to ground myself when life felt chaotic.

But life wasn’t linear, and I wasn’t always able to maintain the practices I’d cultivated. I felt like two parts of myself were at odds: the part drawn to spirituality and the part that loved to party, to rave, and to lose myself in the rhythm of dance floors. Growing up in the 90s and early 2000s, raving was part of the culture. It gave me a sense of connection, of togetherness. But over time, I realised that while it was fun, it couldn’t fulfil me.

At 35, I fell pregnant. It was a gift, and for the first time, I let go of all the habits that had been holding me back. My son became my purpose. I meditated more, treasured the connection with my baby, and even surprised myself by breastfeeding for over two years. That period of my life was all about nurturing—not just my son, but a deeper part of myself.

I finally trained as a yoga teacher, something I’d dreamed about for years. I thought I’d focus on ashtanga, but I developed an unexpected affinity for yin yoga. Teaching yin brought a sense of calm and healing that resonated deeply with me. But life had other lessons to teach me.

When my son was four, his father and I split up, and my life turned upside down. I became a single mother, and grief, loss, and betrayal hit me hard. I spiralled into a dark place, barely holding it together as I tormented myself with thoughts of what I could have done differently. One day, I looked in the mirror and didn’t recognise the person staring back.

That was the turning point.

I began researching neuroplasticity and discovered Jason Stevenson’s guided meditations. Then I found Kamini Desai’s Yoga Nidra: The Art of Transformational Sleep. Yoga Nidra became my sanctuary, a practice where I could leave my worries behind and receive healing. It was accessible—I didn’t have to sit cross-legged for an hour. I could just lie down, listen, and breathe. Through Yoga Nidra, I learned about Sankalpa—setting an intention—and realised I could reprogram my internal patterns.

Yoga Nidra changed everything.

For years, I practised daily, sometimes twice a day. Slowly, my life began to transform. I felt more balanced, more in tune with myself, and more connected to something greater. My faith deepened. I fell in love again, and for the first time, I felt truly secure in a relationship.

Then, in 2022, something extraordinary happened. After years of spiritual practice, I experienced what I now understand was a Kundalini Awakening. It was bewildering, magical, and life-altering. The experience brought me face-to-face with a deep, divine love—a love that underpins the entire universe.

Since that day, my sense of purpose has been clear. I know we are here to remember who we truly are: droplets in an ocean of infinite bliss and love. My purpose is to help others remember, to heal, and to awaken to their true selves.

Today, I teach yoga with a deeper understanding of its transformative power. It’s not just about bending into shapes; it’s a gateway to healing and awakening. My sessions now incorporate tantric practices, mantra, chakra meditations, and kriya pranayama, helping others connect with the divine mother and experience their own healing journeys.

I also continue to grow, recording online sessions to reach more people. My work is ever-evolving, but at its core, it’s about love, connection, and transformation.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that we’re all so much more powerful than we realise. The key is to trust, to surrender, and to remember that love is our essence.